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Personal Growth and Building Positive Self Esteem

Every aspect of a person’s behavioral tendencies has some root in how they value themselves. While the roots of self esteem may have been formed in early childhood, it is never too late to nurture and develop an enhanced view of yourself. Becoming aware of low self esteem by understanding how it is formed is important as people learn to improve their experience and live happier more successful lives.
Mental health professionals know that self esteem can be built and that people have the ability to learn the skills needed to develop positive inner feelings about themselves. With a little bit of understanding and awareness, almost anybody can master the art of self acceptance
Here are some things to remember when learning to value yourself:
• Adults are responsible for raising their own self esteem. Even in the case of abuse, trauma and neglect in childhood, self esteem can be increased one small step at a time through consciously choosing and managing thoughts.
• Becoming clear on personal values and priorities is essential. Many people find themselves living their lives from their parents’ perspective. Finding your unique preferences, convictions and values is one of the keys to building self esteem.
• Learn to consciously choose to think in a positive manner until it becomes habitual. Replace negative adjectives that you may use to describe yourself such as fat, stupid, or loser to more positive descriptions like successful, kind or trustworthy. Affirm these new ways of thinking to yourself by repeating them aloud or silently. Beliefs are built through repetition. Some sample affirmations are as follows:
I am loved.
I am worthy of a good life.
I accept myself as I am.

Author and personal development expert, Michele Harvey, states in her book, From Confusion to Clarity, “If you resist the urge to hide from your pain or to isolate yourself from others, you will become larger and able to lend grander meaning to this thing we call life. You are part of the Divine. Resist the idea of judging yourself and others. Take back your wisdom and power. You are stronger than you think, and if you use the power of your soul, rather than only using your mind, you will begin to seek and to attract like-minded people and circumstances that will assist you in raising the vibration of your life.” This is deepest and truest understanding of self esteem.
For more information about personal growth and building positive self esteem through the book, From Confusion to Clarity by Michele Harvey, go to

25 Responses to Blog

  • Jeri says:

    Your book sounds like a worthwhile read. Right now I’m listening to the audiobook of 10% Happier and am loving it. So much of how we encounter and react or our world can be made better if we train ourselves to be more positive in thought and action. Condition the mind is just like any other exercise.

  • Crystal Ross says:

    Hi! I love affirmations! I do the five minute journal everyday. It has one affirmation in there and then you list things you are grateful for. I agree that it is important to stay in the positive. Great post and good luck with book! =)

  • Tuhin says:

    It is extremely important for us to know our worth and learn to respect ourselves. Confidence comes when we start to recognize our inner strength and capabilities!

  • Arleen says:

    I have learned that how we react to something is in our control. You can create your own happiness and no one can do it for. I love articles about self help

  • kerri zane says:

    It is so true. we are the creators of our own happiness. Thanks for reminding us!

  • Tim says:

    Adults are responsible for raising their own self esteem.Everyone needs to be reminded of these points every now and then. Great article and thank you. Tim

  • I think that some of us are born positive thinkers and that others have to really work at it. I feel so fortunate that I naturally look on the bright side of every situation. There have only been a couple of times in my life where that optimism and trusting nature did not work in my favour. Cheers!

    • Meditation offers practitioners deep insight and understanding as well as peace of mind. These benefits are cumulative and available to everyone, whether or not they are born positive thinkers. Thanks for your comment, Doreen.

  • Self Esteem is very important and as I grow older I am loving myself more and more. I really try to instill self love in my kids not necessarily knowing exactly how to do that. My daughter is a young adult and I see her struggling to totally love herself. She doesn’t see in her what I see. My son who is 15 seems to just not care about too much but I’m thinking that will change. I constantly tell them how wonderful they are but they need to see it for themselves. I also try to lead by example.

    • Children are influenced by peer pressure. As their self esteem and self image evolves, it often depends more on their friends than on their parents. It helps children, as I believe it helps anyone, to be a part of something that is bigger than just ourselves. This gives us something to hope for, something to work toward, which can enrich our feelings of self-worth. Leading by example hits the nail on the head and there are many ways of doing this. I recommend inspirational books and films, many of which are appropriate for children of various ages as well as for adults. Meditation practices still the mind creating a wonderful, clear perspective, and if done consistently, they can be profoundly helpful for enhancing self esteem through understanding.

  • Catarina says:

    Could not have said it better myself, Michele.

    Seems to me there are far too many people with high self confidence and low self esteem in this world. Their behaviour consequently leaves a lot to be desired. Wish they would read your book.:-)

  • Krystyna says:

    You’re absolutely right, it’s never too late to start building your self-esteem. It’s a little like practicing piano – you have to work on it every day. Looking for the positive is so important, no matter what else may have transpired in your life. Again, it’s a habit that requires conscious effort but provides great rewards and validation.

    • I agree with you Krystyna. Changing habits involves changing thought patterns by training our mind on a daily basis. Each morning I ask myself how I choose to show up that day, as a larger version of myself, and then check-in with myself periodically throughout the day, to make sure I am showing up that way, or to course correct if necessary. This practice comes from Neale Donald Walsch’s work and it has changed my life.

  • Joanne says:

    Yes, so often I find adults who had a tragedy in their childhood use that and the people involved for their shortfalls as an adult. I have said frequently, you’re an adult now – fix it.

  • Becc says:

    I think I need to read this book. I would love to master the art of self acceptance and want so much for my little boy to have the self esteem that I did not have growing up.

    • Thank You so much for your comment Becc. My book, From Confusion To Clarity: Vital Personal Growth in 30 Days or Less, (introduction by Conversations With God author, Neale Donald Walsch) can be ordered from the home page of this website or by clicking If you order this way, I can personally send you a signed copy of the book. If you prefer, you can also order it @ and Wishing You All The Best.

  • I think your suggestion to think about things in a positive way is so important. I believe that we get back what we put out there. If we are full of negativity, then all we experience is the negative. About 6 weeks ago I started to schedule myself to think about three things that make me happy every morning, it has had a tremendous and positive effect on my attitude.

  • Great sample affirmation. Sometimes it makes all of the difference if you can speak to and assure yourself of your worth. Fantastic reminder. Thank you!

  • You can’t be good for anybody, until you are good for yourself. Finding self-esteem can be a long and painful journey. Yet there is no greater reward! Great post and thanks for sharing it.

  • Diana says:

    Good reading, thanks for this post. It is true that self-love is the first step to anything and everything. Whether you are trying to lose weight, build a relationship, raise a child, whatever else might come to mind – positive attitude and embracing who you are is key. Good luck with the book, Michelle!

    • Thank you so much Diana. I’m glad my post resonates with you. I have a new book coming out very shortly called, Poetry for Living an Inspired Life: Poems as Spiritual Meditation. I believe the two books compliment each other well. All the best to you!

  • Arleen says:

    Self esteem is the key to survival. We all think we need to be slim because of Madison Avenue push. No one is perfect, even the ones that are models. Age gets us all. Therefore it is important to love yourself. Your post is right on.

  • Kharis Macey says:

    Hi Michele, this is a great blog and insight into emotional healing and growth. Good luck with the book.

  • Cheree says:

    Really liked what you had to say in your post, Blog |, thanks for the good read!
    — Cheree

  • Joseph L Morkeh-Yamson says:

    I have read Michele Harvey’s book titled From Confusion To Clarity.
    I find it’s simplicity most exquisite,it readily gets down to the bare bones.
    I most certainly would recommend her book to all those on a spiritual path.
    Her book provides one with the very basic tools in finding clarity to mans,
    present haze of confusion.

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